Would it have been better if my daughter had died at birth?
While Tracy s love for her nine-year-old severely disabled daughter Nicole is without question, her heartbreaking words demonstrate the emotional battle she and other mothers of disabled children experience on a daily basis.
Tracy appeared on BBC1 s Kilroy programme on premature babies last week and found her frank and courageous admission was overwhelmingly greeted with compassion.
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Hide AdSeveral other mothers on the programme admired her honesty and bravery and others too admitted feeling the same.
Tracy, a single mother of three, of Ticehurst Road, told her story in the hope that couples experiencing premature baby deaths like that of Gordon and Sarah Brown s daughter Jennifer Jane, may find some comfort during their grieving.
"I wanted to reach out and tell them that though it is heartbreaking to lose a premature baby, sometimes it is for the best," she said.
"I felt if in some way I could ease their grief by telling them Nicole s story and what she has to go through, then it would be something.
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Hide Ad"Some people say how wonderful it is to see these babies survive. But would they if they knew what their future would be?"
Nicole was born at 24 weeks with a cerebral bleed following a difficult pregnancy involving several threats of miscarriage and six weeks of hospitalisation, during which Tracy s two other children had to live with relatives in Somerset and Burgess Hill.
Nicole weighed just 1lb 50z. She is now severely disabled with complex medical needs.
Nicole s quality of life is extremely poor and Tracy fights a constant battle with her daughter s medical conditions.